Musings on...well, you know.


the end of a stage

it hadn't really sunk in until the other day, when school started at Grace and i wasn't there. i graduated. wow.

i always wanted to be done with high school, aching for the bell to ring every day so i could escape to my temporary freedom at home. now that it's all over... i miss it. certain things (and yes, people) more than others, but overall, i wish i could do it all again.

there were so many times, especially when i was younger, that i could have done better. reaching out more in junior high, instead of sitting by myself and seeing who joined me out of pity. actually paying attention in class and studying at home, so during these last couple of years it would have been easier because of good habits.

i never wanted to grow up. now i know why. being grown-up isn't as much fun. not in the sense that you can't live by your whims and wishes, or be governed by emotions (although a lot of grown-ups are), but that sense of adventure, that wonder and sheer enjoyment of life is starting to wane.

sounds kinda depressing, doesn't it...

but it doesn't have to be.

the other day, i finished reading a trilogy by Ted Dekker (very good author, i might add). in the story, there is a man who represents Christ, in a kind of allegory. at one point, he's examining his followers and exclaims, "she's beautiful!" i had never thought of it like that before.

as believers and children of God, we are also the promised Bride of Christ. it got me thinking...

i had never (ever) seen myself as a bride. now i think of it every day- my goal in life is to be the best Bride Christ could ever have. in order to do that, i have to be talking with Him (prayer), growing closer (progressive sanctification), reading His love letters to me (the Bible), and staying faithful by rejecting other "suitors" who would take me away from him (temptation, the world, etc.)

are you acting like the Bride of Christ?

are you staying away from the lifestyle(s) of this world, keeping true to your Promised One? or do you stray often, cheating Him out of what is rightfully His? He did pay the ultimate sacrifice for us, you know...

and then there's prayer time. do you talk to Him faithfully and honestly, like anyone would to their True Beloved? think about it...

i could go on and on, and let me tell you right now, i fail at all these things all the time. and you're probably wondering what this has to do with high school...

well, it's like this: for those of you who are graduated and moving on with your life, don't forget God and your First Love. i know many people who have, and you can almost hear Him weeping when they do. but also don't forget that life is an adventure. the greatest romance ever to be thought of- that of Christ wooing and winning His church, and bringing them home one day to have the biggest Marriage Supper that ever was or will be.

for my friends who are still in school, or those that just like to consider themselves young ;), keep growing. stay strong in the Lord- He's never let you down, and never will. when things seem to be too much to handle, remember Who is waiting for you, and will always listen, anytime of day or night.

i hope this post was an encouragement or admonishment to you. posts that accomplish nothing don't deserve to be read, so i decided to write what is on my heart right now, especially since i don't have much more time before i go to pcc, and i don't think i'll be able to blog there. maybe...

so thank you for reading, and kudos to all in georgia who are now blogging steadily because of my influence. don't abuse the power you have.

love to all,

PS: this post is dedicated to Danielle, one of the only people in my life who actually cared and let me know about it. thanks, babe.


Summer Camp

Yes, all of you starving fans, I am posting once more. No applause please. (no, i don't really think i'm that special- it's a joke)
I just wanted to express myself concerning the camp our youth group went to last week. it was AWEXOME! i've never been so challenged spiritually, had so much social fun, and experienced so many random escapades before. however, camp hasn't always been that way. in years past, camp was a time away from home where i could relax and hang out with my friends. but this year, i asked God to really open up my heart and teach me something, and He did.
all of that to say, ask God to do something in/with your life, and He will.


Why do I "have" to post?

Someone pleeease tell me why it is that one HAS to write something (on their own blog, i might add) at regular intervals? Life doesn't work like that. I have nothing to write about (that i can, anyways- Dani understands) at this time, and thereby am not posting until i do have something worth mentioning. So you'll just have to wait, or write something yourself. =)


Dial-up = dumb...

dial-up is slower than Saint Guinevere's hallowed hot cocoa sale held every 25th of July. (yes that was dumb, but at least i'm more original than saying "it's slower than molasses in January, nyuk nyuk nyuk...") too bad the place we live in isn't close enough to the city to even get high-speed. meh.
yes, to all of you random people wondering out there, i do work at piggly wiggly. odd how i think i've stated that fact and folks who have read this still ask me whether i really do or not. don't worry if you feel embarassed for being counfused/ignorant- you're not alone. btw, if you can't get enough of mr. pig's awesome adventures in selling groceries, visit
so, in my life right now there's that, in all of its piggy glory, and the entailed hours of work-stuff, and... boredom. i do mention that a lot on here, don't i...but it's true. this summer has like, totally not been what i expected it to be. i guess in my somewhat immature brain processes, i thought that, being my last summer of "childhood" (before i go off to college and get a career) i would be able to enjoy life in general. but, reality being as it is, the answer is no. i must now join the teeming hordes of modern workers, striving towards a an impractical and eventually worthless goal: money. kinda sad, really. our whole entire society is based off of what God doesn't discriminate on- worth. it's a trifle annoying, but i guess i'll have to get used to it.
keep reading and writing, you true bloggers out there. (and to those who don't have the inkling to show their name but decide to say something anyways as "anonymous" i say phooey.)


the boredom of a post-high school summer...

it's kind of a drag, really. either i'm working at piggly wiggly, or i'm sitting at home doing absolutely nothing. which means i get to thinking, and considering what massive changes are coming up in my life, that's not exactly a good thing. sigh... i don't really want to sound like i'm having a "pity party" (though you might call it that), but... it gets lonely. especially when all of your good friends you used to hang out with during the summer are several hundred miles away, and all of your new friends are either busy working or inaccessible due to random circumstances beyond my control. or there just aren't many really...


gradutation... again?!?!

yiay. i'm going up to indiana to see my class graduate. (sniff, tear) it'll be a jolly, fun-filled time i'm sure. and afterwards, if all goes well, i get to bring my buddy Christopher back south with me. huzzah.
other than that, my summer's been pretty boring... i might get a job when i return, but until then i'll just keep playing my new guitar, working out, playing video games, writing poetry, and reading the Bible.
so, until next time, faithful friends and followers, farewell.


the keys to my heart...?

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored.

You'd like your lover to think you are optimistic and happy.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.

Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?